I Can’t Believe I’m Writing These Words

Posted By on Apr 25, 2013 | 38 comments

My daddy died today.

I can’t believe I’m writing these words.

I’ve been moaning and crying and begging God for one last opportunity to tell him I love him.

I just want him to know I’ll never forget his uplifting cards and time spent sitting, watching the kids paint or play or sing and the holiday flowers/chocolates/fruit baskets he often surprised us with—just because.

Dad was the best gift-giver and the first to call on my birthday and the one who offered the most words of encouragement—even when they didn’t feel deserved.

Today’s violent shake is a reminder that life passes before you know it.

Go kiss the kids one more time.

Hug on my hubby just a little longer.

Say “I love you,” even though you’ve said it umpteen times.

Just because.

I miss you daddy.

I’m so sorry I didn’t call you more often or write to you more or tell you every day how much your words lifted my spirit.

You fought diabetes and endured a kidney transplant and open-heart surgery and then the mouth cancer. But today, you’re walking streets paved with gold, in a new perfectly whole body, with no pain or limitations.

I’ll see you again one day.

I just wish I could have told you one last time “I love you with all my heart.”

Because I really do.

53815_10151142638740502_881485686_o (1)My sister, my daddy, and me.

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